A FORETASTE OF LIFE WITHOUT THE CAPTAIN.
The Captain had gone north, leaving on a Saturday.
To de-winterize Final Fling aka, our summer home aka, The Floating Condo.
Got that?
It now was Sunday.
The house was quiet.
Which normally I love.
But this was different.
It was too quiet.
It was an “empty” quiet.
I wandered around the house. Restless.
It had started raining. Cancelling out another walk.
The dogs sat staring at the door through which he always comes.
Parents talk about the “empty nest syndrome when the last kid leaves for college.
We talk about feeling empty after a breakup.
We talk about feeling empty after a divorce.
And then there’s the final and big empty following the death of a loved one.
Your world is empty. Your house is empty. Your life is empty.
I finally turned on the T.V. (Gasp!)
Found a Hallmark movie.
Nothing better than a Hallmark movie to pass the time on a rainy day. Nothing much ever happens. There’s never really a nasty person in a Hallmark movie. And the semi-nasty always get their come-uppance.
No violence and murder and guns and not many special effects. Just a simple story well told with an unknown cast.
I pick up my knitting.
The dogs settle in.
The rain spatters against the window.
The Captain calls.
We talk about “nothings.”
“Did you eat?” (Him to me.)
“Did you sleep well? Were you warm enough?” (Me to him.)
“Is the boat very dirty?” (Me again.)
Of course, I talk more. And we always end with –
“I love you.”
I go back to my movie. And my knitting. And the dogs.
The empty silence has been filled.
For now.
But not the house.
And I think about the time that might come. With the same scenario. Only –
There won’t be a phone call.
He’ll never walk through that door again.
I promise myself to make the most of every moment we have together now.
Building memories.
For the days when it could be –
-
Just me.
-
My knitting.
-
The dogs.
-
A Hallmark movie.
-
An empty house.
-
On a rainy day.
Alone but not lonely.
An unseen presence always at my side.
Matthew 28:20 “Teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you.
And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
Cyber Hugs and Blessings All.
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